Opinions are Like... Well, We've All Got One - Part II

On Veteran's Day, and all year through, I'd like to say thank you to all who've served the United States of America in order that we might maintain our freedoms. Thank you!

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A couple of years ago I wrote a post about opinions and political correctness. I guess you’d call that Part I since I’m bringing it up again.

There’s a huge difference between being polite and thoughtful and being politically correct. It seems to me that political correctness has crossed a line. I read an article in yesterday’s newspaper about a Secretary at a corrections facility who sent a memo to staff saying “Those serving time in prison will no longer be referred to as prisoners, offenders or convicts. Instead, they will be called students if they are in some type of class and patients if they are in the prison infirmary.” A spokesman said “…if no other moniker applies, they will be identified as incarcerated persons.”

I’m sorry (she said facetiously), but I intend to call a prisoner a prisoner, a convict a convict and a criminal a criminal. Chances are they were convicted of a crime or they probably wouldn’t be in prison.

Some of the stories I’ve heard on the news about new college rules make me glad I’m not going to college today. I won’t repeat some of those rules because they’re simply ridiculous.

Frankly, I’m tired of feeling like I have to watch every word I say in public. One of the reasons I enjoy being a fiction writer is that I, or my characters, can say what they want. Mystery writers tend to include crimes in their books. Are we supposed to pussy foot around what happened to create the mystery? Are we supposed to be politically correct with our words? If we aren’t, are the Word Police going to show up at our doors?

The way I look at it, books are like television in that if the story is upsetting the reader, they can get rid of the book just like they can change a channel.

I wrote the original post because I read that a number of colleges had students requesting “trigger warnings” on books. That means if there’s a controversial crime, or even a non-controversial crime in the story then there should be a warning on the cover. Someone could read the book and be upset over what it says. It could bring back bad memories. If that’s the case, don’t read the book.

If a book contains specific and graphic violence or graphic sex, maybe it could be in the blurb on the back of the book. Reader beware. Read the blurbs on the back cover.

When did common sense fly out the window? Many of the things written in books would never be tolerated in today’s real life situations, even if they’re innocently said. Have people become that thin-skinned?

I recalled reading about a kindergarten boy kissing a kindergarten girl on the cheek and it was considered sexual harassment. When I was a kid that simply would have caused giggling among the children. So the little boy has to pay a price for kissing a little girl on the cheek? Give me a break.

How hard is it to change a channel or set a book aside if you find it offensive? How hard is it to acknowledge that children will be children?

If you disagree with me, that’s your right – just as it’s my right to speak up. Enough is enough, and I certainly hope this political correctness, at the lengths it’s reached, is dealt with soon. Yes, be polite when it’s called for and, yes, be thoughtful when possible. However, don’t try to dictate to everyone else how they should act or speak.

Okay, this deserves some discussion. Do you feel things have gone too far? Do you feel things are out of balance? Does it affect your writing? Do you ever change something you’ve written because someone might not accept it (in terms of political correctness)? Or do you write what you feel is right?

Until next week, try not to judge me too harshly. I do frequently use my common sense, although maybe today I should have kept my trap shut. It just felt like it had to be said.

CLICK HERE to visit Marja McGraw’s website

CLICK HERE for a quick trip to Amazon.com

Having a Great Crime – Wish You Were Here (A Sandi Webster Mystery) is just waiting for some new readers. Give it a try.

Are We Having Fun Yet?

This has been one of those days. I’ve been wracking my brain (which can be kind of scary), trying to think of a new topic for a post. Nothing came to mind (which is even scarier).

Then I thought about yesterday. My daughter and I went out to lunch and had a sweet, funny and polite waitress. I left her one of my Thank You cards. You might wonder what that is. It’s a business card that I make myself. On one side it says, “Thank You for your courtesy and service.” At the bottom of the card there’s an arrow that points to the side, making people want to turn it over. On the backside it says, “Marja McGraw Mysteries” and has my website address. 

  The Thank You card has surprised me on occasion. Once, some time ago, a waitress actually chased me out to the parking lot to thank me for thanking her. True story.

I also found some great pens. They look like brushed metal and they have a flashlight in the top. I pass those out frequently, and sometimes leave one with the Thank You card. They have Marja McGraw Mysteries and my website address embossed on them.

Yeah, yeah. Someone out there is thinking, “Okay, so what’s your point?”

My point is, promotional items can help as much as promotion on the Internet. I’ve tried several different things, but these two seem to work the best. I’ve told someone I appreciate them, and I sometimes back it up with a gift of the pen.

I tried some small calendars, maybe 3” x 5”, but those didn’t seem to draw much interest. I’ve tried bookmarks, but they wear out and get thrown away. But pens? People look at them every time they use them. I’ve given pens to the UPS delivery guy, the woman working behind the counter in the pharmacy, neighbors, receptionists, doctors and a woman in line behind me at the store. I got some great letter openers, but unless someone is sitting behind a desk, most people aren’t interested. All of the items I’ve tried have my name, a reference to mysteries, and my website address on them.

I often come across as an outgoing woman. In all honesty, I’m not. It’s taken age and experience to bring me out of my shell. Well, that and working in law enforcement. Those guys don’t put up with “shy”.

I occasionally give someone a complimentary book in the hopes they’ll enjoy it and spread the word. One time I was at the beauty shop and an elderly couple came in. My stylist introduced us because the woman was an avid reader. I gave her a book and you’d have thought I’d handed her a hundred dollar bill. I found out later that she and her husband didn’t have much, and she appreciated the gesture more than I could have imagined. It turned out she told everyone who’d listen about my book – not just that she enjoyed it, but that it had been a gift.

Maybe you can’t afford to give books away, and I can’t either. However, on rare occasions, it’s worth it in the long run.

If you’re thinking about In Person promotion, think outside the box. Think up something memorable. Steal my idea about the Thank You cards. I probably stole the idea from someone else, but I can’t recall who at the moment.

And if something works? Keep doing it, and when possible, add to it.

A woman recently bought ten of my books and asked me to sign them and mail them to her friends. I included one of the pens in each package. I heard that the friends were calling this woman even before they read the book because they were so impressed with the pens. (I sure hope they like the book, too.)

I’ve only talked about three steps in the promotional trail here, but you can come up with more. Tell us about them. What works for you?

Until next time, remember that even a verbal Thank You can go a long way. It makes a difference when someone knows we appreciate them.

CLICK HERE to visit Marja McGraw’s website

CLICK HERE for a quick trip to Amazon.com

I’ve had a few reports that reading “Choosing One Moment – A Time Travel Mystery” has brightened a few readers’ days. Need a lift? Give it a try. And Thank You!

Characters with Character

Do people (or animals) in books need to have character? You betcha.

In real life we often form opinions of people based on their character. Are they honest or do they lie? If they lie, are they white lies to keep from hurting someone’s feelings?

Jane turned in a circle before asking John, “What do you think of my new dress?”

Talk about a loaded question.

Without thinking it through first, John made a disastrous reply. “”It makes you look (too heavy), (too thin), (the color makes you look sickly).” Take your pick. Oh, and there’s always the infamous, “It makes your behind look too big.” He probably should have told a little white lie.

Of course, there are characters who lie for a good reason. Take a private investigator. They may lie to gain valuable information or to remove themselves from a less than happy situation.

In A Well-Kept Family Secret, Sandi Webster hides behind a truck with a camper so she can spy on someone. The truck owner sees her and they have a mini-confrontation. He wants to know why she’s hiding behind his truck. She tells him she’s admiring it, and he immediately starts to flirt with her. Okay, he came on to her, and he wasn’t a man you’d take home to mother.

“Aw, come on. You come for a ride with me and we’ll go have a picnic somewhere nice and quiet.” He was so close to my side that I could feel his breath on my ear. Ack! Along with the need for a bath, this guy needed to brush his teeth.

I backed away, right into the side of the truck. He leaned in and placed the palm of his hand by my shoulder.

I ducked under his other arm, which was about to effectively close me in, and headed for my car.

“Another time, pal. I’ve got to get going. My husband and seven kids will be waiting for me at home. Do you think a person could fit seven kids into this camper? They love picnics. In fact, Brutus, Jr. was the result of a picnic.”

“Seven kids?” His face registered horror. “Really?” He was backing away from me.

That might be a silly example, but sometimes you have to lie to help you out of a bad situation.

It’s not just about lies or honesty, though. Character is what you’re made of; your good and bad qualities, your eccentricities or unusual habits, or just the fact that you’re a hard worker or maybe you’re lazy. The list is long.

I’ve read books with characters who are one-dimensional and/or who are too perfect. In real life I don’t know anyone who’s perfect. If they act like they can do no wrong, I’ll probably keep my distance. If I like someone and enjoy their company, it includes their good points and their character flaws. I feel the same way about players in a book. If they seem too perfect, then I automatically mistrust them. Something is definitely wrong if they never make a mistake, never do something embarrassing, or never do something outrageous.

The key word there is “never”. Some people don’t make a lot of mistakes, but there’s always that one time. It makes them real to the reader.

A slip of the tongue can easily tell the reader about the player’s  character.

And don’t forget mannerisms. A nervous person might fold and unfold a napkin while they speak, or systematically tear it into little pieces. He or she might tap their fingers on a desktop when they’re asked an uncomfortable question. Maybe they develop a tic in their eye.

All of these things create an imperfect character, which is actually one of the better people in a book. By better, I mean they’re more realistic.

There are too many characteristics to cover in a blog post, but this gives the general idea. I believe if someone looks for the perfect person, they’re not being realistic. I’d rather look for imperfections I can live with and accept, and that includes characters in books.

What are some of the characteristics that make up an individual that you find memorable? How about someone who snorts when they laugh? Maybe someone who would rather be the wallflower at an event? A sense of humor?

Until next time, pay attention to people and decide what you like about them in the way of mannerisms or personality. Don’t close them out because of some small personality flaw. Enjoy people for who and what they are.

CLICK HERE to visit Marja McGraw’s website

CLICK HERE for a quick trip to Amazon.com

There are Words, and Then Again, There are Words

In 2011 I wrote a post about words. Reading it again made me realize how today it’s even truer than it was then. I’m reposting it this week.

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I was going to blog about Bookstore Divas this week, but after listening to TV and news stories I’ve decided it’s time to write about words – words and figures of speech.

Several years ago, before “going postal” became a catch phrase, I was at work and talking to one of the maintenance men. I was mildly annoyed about something someone did (I can’t recall what or who) and I said, “Oh, I could just shoot him.” This maintenance man was horrified, and I was quite surprised. I hadn’t said it with venom, or even anger. I had to explain that it was only a figure of speech. He didn’t know what that meant so I had to explain it to him. By the time I walked away, I could have throttled the maintenance man, figuratively speaking.

As a writer, it breaks my heart to hear people trying to clip figures of speech out of the American dialogue. For crying out loud, not everything is meant to be taken seriously and not everything has a hidden or double meaning. A cliché is a cliché, and a figure of speech is just that – a figure of speech. There’s a time for political correctness (PC); however, I tend to think of PC as using common courtesy and common sense speech. Unfortunately, translation has gone way beyond accepting courtesy and common sense.

If I overheard someone plotting a murder and they said, “I could just shoot him,” that’s one thing. However, if I heard a friend say the same thing about the husband she was frustrated with, I wouldn’t give it a second thought. She would have been venting, letting go of some of her frustration, and that would probably be a good thing.

I was at the airport and someone asked me what I do for a living. I almost told her I write murder mysteries, but I caught myself and simply told her I’m a writer. Good grief! I didn’t want the TSA calling me aside because someone overheard me utter the word murder. I also didn’t want to be a diva and look down my nose at her and say, “I’m an author. (sniff)” I’m just a simple writer with simple ways, but I do write darned good mysteries that aren’t simple. I should be able to be proud of that and sing out the words, “I write murder mysteries! I think you’d like them,” without looking over my shoulder.

So, okay, as a writer I think people are getting carried away with the hidden meaning of words and phrases. I think the Word Police need to take a step back and think about the context in which these figures of speech are being used. Frankly, I think everyone should take a step back and hopefully realize they’re frequently making a big deal out of nothing. (Yes, I realize sometimes things are a big deal.)

I know we live in some trying and scary times and there’s more violence in the world than there should be. However, lighten up a little. There’s enough drama with what’s really going on today without worrying about catch phrases and clichés, especially in books. These are tools a writers uses from time to time and they’re also words that people use every single day, somewhere and in some way. It doesn’t mean everything they say should be taken literally.

This is at least the second time I’ve climbed up on my soap box, so it’s probably time to step down. I should get back to the mind-boggling idea of taking more comments with a grain of salt and letting others roll off my back. The only killing that goes on in my world is in books, and I’d like to keep it that way. Don’t take offense if one of my characters says something that’s not politically correct. They’re just fictional people, after all.

Until next time, have a great week and stop looking over your shoulder for the Word Police. Enjoy life at least a little.

CLICK HERE to visit Marja McGraw’s website

CLICK HERE for a quick trip to Amazon.com

A Well-Kept Family Secret will soon be available in AUDIO format. Watch for it. In the meantime, What Are the Odds? is available in both ebook and paperback format.